why do I have to relapse at the party I’m throwing?

maybe being suicidal will make me skinny bcus all I’ve eaten is a lean cuisine microwave dinner and that was at 10am

my hands look like small child hands I feel small and infantile and scared and alone

I don’t want to record videos of me singing because I’m fat and ugly and I suck at music.

right now id do fucking anything to lose like 30 lbs

being around people who also struggle w eating disorders n weight is not good for me

just wanna go home

I wish I didn’t have to exist

very tired of living

feels shitty man

I SEE YOU LOOKING AT MY READMORES I WISH YOUD JUST UNFOLLOW ME ALREADY jesus christ